What is exciting in life?

I was looking at it... And it was hard to understand what was staring back at me.

Was it something, or was it an absence?

Now, this sounds like it's leading to something very zen and space-agey or a bad knock-knock joke.

It's going to be neither - I don't have many Ghandi quotes on file, let alone my own comedy act.

Yet what I was looking at was a perplexing answer to a question I had asked myself:

"What would I be doing, and would excite me, day-to-day, if I already had £100 million in my bank account?"

And my answer was, well... Very little. Here I was, excited to fantasise about all the things I would do if I achieved the dream we all dream of: having the complete rich-life forever, with stability.

And I love to think about all the ways I can live the lazy lifestyle. Responsibilities: yuck! 🤮

Yet, as soon as I confronted myself to specify, on a daily basis, how I would fill the void that would be created once the necessity to work was filled up, I was drawing blanks.

Then I remembered I only have £90 million in the bank! Phew! 😋Time to postpone the existential questions some more...

From what I could conjur, I thought about the traveling plans I might have for visiting Asia, seeing beautiful scenery, all the relaxation, fun, avoiding the sickness induced by daily duties...

Sounds great, doesn't it?

Yet, reflecting on what would excite me day-to-day, and how I would spend my time by choice, was more difficult than I anticipated. Perhaps more difficult than the usual career trajectory and plans we ascribe to ourselves:

"I will just keep on working for the next 30-50 years  and THEN I will be able to really get to life! To do what I want!"

By asking this question, I was trying to get to the crux of this standard life plan: what do we actually want, rather than need, to do with our life? What would we voluntarily choose to do after work obligations were finished?

You are perhaps wondering: "Why is this random internet person telling me that he doesn't know what he wants to do with his life?... And why have I kept reading this far into his rambles?"

My own existential angst aside, I feel my difficulties here might point to an important consideration we, myself painfully included, don't give enough structured thought to:

What are we actually striving for in life by doing all this work? What would the life that we so dream of creating actually look like?

We might tell ourselves using general ideas of " I would have fun" "relax!" or "doing things I want to do!" Yet digging into the weeds of defining these things suggested I, and maybe some others too, don't know as much about our ideal life as we thought.

So what?

It could suggest that the things that we place so much value on being free from - work, obligations, mental stimulation, structure, a job, the daily hustle - are chased so intently because we don't know what we would do otherwise.

For instance, I certainly thought all about traveling the world, spending time with family, and having some unforgettable experiences.

I still, however, thought about work-related activities that I'd enjoy: sharing ideas with others (like this, albeit, perhaps being a tad better at it?), having interesting conversations with people affecting the world, working to induce some positive change and reduce some suffering myself. Perhaps all with more control and joy than we believe we have with traditional jobs.

Was it money I was really after in life, or really just the freedom to choose what I wanted to do, and when I wanted to do it?

To end the rambles

Of course, I have absolutely zero idea how we would get to the £100 million stage in life where this is possible. I am barely able to plan my current day, let alone the rest of them. How on earth could I advise you, or anyone else's, days?

Yet, perhaps this could be an invitation to similarly question yourself, to see if you run into some difficulties as I did:

• what would you do day-to-day if you didn't need to worry about money?
• What would truly excite you?

Maybe you might begin to, even slightly, question some plans and assumptions you thought you knew about yourself and life. Perhaps there's a void there like I found... what could that mean?

How to get that life?

Well, I'd suggest looking to some people smarter than me, there are a few billion of them out there. Besides, I seem to be better at asking questions than answering them.

Please let me know if you have any answers. Tell me what you think!